Julian: I want to be taken seriously as one of the greatest thinkers of our time.
I: How much inspiration do you get from friends?
Julian: I hate them all.
I: Does hanging out with dark artsy people sit well with being a comedian?
Julian: I don’t particularly like being a comedian, or being thought of as one. I want the dark artsy people to surround me and impregnate me with their shadows.
I: Do you have a dark side?
Julian: No. I am a very uncomplicated, open, free, and happy person with a sunny disposition.
I: Is stand up comedy sexy?
Julian: I don’t think it’s mysterious enough. It’s too much like selling. Or crowd control. I stopped doing it some years ago and am completely happy I did.
I: How important is London as a base to you?
Julian: London gives me friends and panic attacks.
I: Style is obviously important to you.
Julian: Sometimes I wish I could dress up and doll myself up like Chris or Noel, but I look odd in make up, like a perverted vicar. Most often it doesn’t coincide with the person I imagine I look like. I like to imagine that I’m tall and willowy and yet, when I catch myself in the mirror, I see a portly, writer-shaped man with tiny red eyes, like a magician’s rabbit.